Pondering

Some of my best times of communion with God are on the examining table, waiting for the doctor to come in for the dreaded cystoscopy. That's where he inserts a tiny camera through my twisted uretha into my bladder to make sure there is no return of cancer.

It's not the fear of a bad report that has me pondering Isaiah 43:1-3; it's the fear of the pain inflicted during the exam. Often the discomfort is minimal but other times... Yesterday was one of those other times.

But as I lay there and recited those verses is my head, it lead to a wonderful time of praise and thanksgiving.

Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine.

Wow! The God of all creation has called me by name and I am His. One of millions and yet I can have a private conversation with Him while thousands of others are also having private conversations with Him. I continue to stand in awe of my incredible God. Sometimes I picture Him like a thick blanket wrapped around the earth in order to be everywhere at once. Yet that is not God. My mind cannot begin to comprehend this vast yet personal God.

So I pondered that as I lay there yesterday. Then I went on to the second verse (Isaiah 43):

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you, and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you...

I knew (know) He would be with me even through this dreaded exam. And then I thought of my Savior, Jesus Christ, of His death on the cross. I was filled with dread for something this tiny when He was filled with dread for His part in the plan of eternal redemption. My pain and discomfort was for my good; His excruciating pain was also for my good but certainly not intended by men for His good.

I thought of what John MacArthur said about Jesus' anticipation of the cross: As a man, Jesus dreaded the pain and suffering of His death; as God, He dreaded becoming sin for us.  Probably not his exact words, but close enough.

What I endured for a few minutes was nothing compared to what He endured for hours!  Although He died for the sins of the world, He died for me and my sins, my imperfections, my inability to live up to  His glory and holiness. I chose to accept the price He paid and am therefore imputed His righteousness before God.

Finally, verse three:

For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.

Hallelujah!  He is my Savior. He is with ME personally! He is attentive to ME! How humbling, yet how assuring. I am so thankful to my God and Savior, so desirous of pleasing Him, so longing to see others live with the same confidence in Him.

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